Repentance

Repentance is an interesting thing.

I've been thinking a bit recently on repentance. After doing some repenting to God, I heard him say this, "Matthew, do you think that it's your repentance that removes your sins?"
An interesting thought, no?
It's always been my understanding that, even if you're a Christian, if you sin, you need to repent to have that sin forgiven. As though there's a tally in heaven that gets recorded with each sin I sin, and then wiped after each time I repent.
I don't think this is true though. If is this so, then it wouldn't be by faith in grace that we are saved and freed from sin (because to be saved [meaning going to heaven] you have to be free of sin) but by works in faith in grace that we're saved, and that's rubbish.
I remember one time, going to listen to some worship music with my sin on my mind, (I always find it awkward to try and do anything with God or God-involved with my sin on my mind) I thought to myself, "I can't listen to worship, I have un-repented for sin." And the still small voice says, "No you don't. I've forgiven you of that." I was surprised, because, like I said, I thought you had to repent to be forgiven, and so I pointed this out to God. He replied something to the effect of, "Your repentance is in your heart, and that's enough for me. You've been forgiven."
I thought, "Hmm, well that's interesting. Okay then."
So, to tie these two things together. Here's what I think.

I think that all my sin, past, present, & future, was wiped away at the cross. The Bible says that I've always been seen as blameless before God because I was to choose the reconciliation of the cross (Ephesians 1:4). But it's because my heart was in a state of knowing repentance when I accepted Christ's sacrifice, and because I default to a humbled state of repentance in my heart that God is able to acknowledge me as clean of sin. It's not that I tell my heart to be repentance, it's not an act I choose, it's because I love him. I think that's the key. Your love for him is what will bring you back to a heart of repentance. I do choose to love him, so to speak, but more so, I can't help but love him. It's really interesting, and I'm not even sure I fully understand it all, or anything I've said thus far. But I do understand this: regardless of what I do, he still loves me, and he's still forgiven me.
I've been struggling with really feeling and knowing that recently, a lot, to be honest. I do still know it. Somewhere, I know it, and I'll always know it. You can't know it, truly know it, and then deny it. Nothing is more true, nothing is more secure, nothing is more eternal than the love of God.